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Greetings and welcome to my Lyme disease blog, a comfy cozy (and sometimes crazy!) place for cutting-edge information, encouragement and insight into the fastest-growing epidemic disease in the United States. In this blog you will find everything from bug-killing strategies to immune system and hormone help, as well as lifestyle and spiritual suggestions for healing from chronic illness involving Lyme disease. The information contained within this blog is based upon my own healing journey and what I have learned over the past eight years as I have been diligently digging and researching my way back to a better state of health. May you find it to be a source of hope, inspiration and wisdom in your own journey towards wellness.

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Thursday, May 17, 2007

The Gift Of Peace Through Suffering

I used to think that peace was something God automatically bestowed upon anyone who would believe in Him. Or that it was a nice by-product of having a happy upbringing and enough serotonin in the brain. Or of spending time in meditation. My journey with illness, however, has taught me something paradoxical. Peace, and its counterpart, joy, are found through pain and suffering.

Perhaps it has something to do with Lyme teaching me to appreciate the things that I am able to do now but which in certain moments along this journey, I could not. Things like, the ability to take a walk without collapsing on the road and the ability to laugh without falling short of breath. To decide to be grateful for what is instead of what isn't, and to find that which is good in a situation rife with difficulty because I have no other choice but to do this or live in despair over my symptoms. I realize that when life's circumstances have been good, I have had less need to cultivate the aforementioned abilities, because less has been at stake. But nearly three years ago, when the winds of change tore my semi-prosperous life apart, my happiness, which had been built on a foundation of circumstance, was taken away, too.

Or perhaps the suffering-joy, pain-peace equation has more to do with the fact that those qualities on the former side of the hyphen have enabled me to develop compassion towards others. I couldn't relate to another's brokenness until I'd gone through some measure of it myself. And peace and joy are the fruit of showing compassion towards others.

I don't particularly like that things are engineered this way. Whether or not you believe in God, do you ever wonder why peace and joy just can't be bestowed upon us like fairy dust? Why must everything good have a price tag attached to it?
But peace is not found in a life of comfort and the fulfillment of all our whims. Sometimes, it is found in the counter-intuitive place of pain, and in the place of loss instead of gain.


Red Letter Believers said...


very good post....
Why does the best learning come through the worst of situations?

David Rupert

Steve Taylor said...

Connie, i'm so glad to have found your blog. I've been sick for over seven years and was finally diagnosed with LD early this year. Wow, what a trip.

I completely agree that this horrendous journey of unremitting physical pain, as well as emotional, has opened up paths to peace that I would have never known existed.

Ironically, I became sick just a few months after my wife and I came to Christ, together, and just 1 month before my full-time ministry position started. It was a whirlwind year back then!!! ;-)

Here I am many years later and through God's Grace i'm still alive and kicking. Without a strong faith I truly don't think i'd still be alive because I would have given up much sooner in the process.

I am eager to read through all your blog entries and wish you peace and healing as you go through this somewhat insane process. Take care.

Steve Taylor aka LymeGuy

Connie Killabugger said...

Hi Steve,

Thanks for your post. I responded back on your blog site ;-)

Blessings to you in your journey!